Some of my friends, who also happen to have intersex conditions, have agreed to short interviews. Today, we welcome Amy, who has Gonadal Dysgenesis.

Thank you so much for being here, Amy. Would you tell us a little about yourself?

Hi, my name is Amy! I am the second oldest of nine children, 6 younger sisters and 2 brothers. I have struggled with addictions over the last 20 years as I have sought to learn who I am. I was sober 9.5 years until I relapsed and now am sober this round 5 years. I am 44 years old and I don’t want to lose any more time trying to “find myself”. I am now divorced. I began dating women and have been in a two-year relationship. I work as a training coordinator for persons with developmental disabilities and mental illness. I do not discuss my condition with many people.

How and when were you told your diagnosis?

I was told for many years before my doctor visit that if I had not had a period by the time I was 17 that my mom was going to take me to see why. I waited for the magical age, the period never came, and I was swooped off to a doctor in Richmond Va. where I lived. All I remember from that day was a blur as we sat in the doctor’s office and I received my diagnosis which I didn’t understand. All I remember hearing is you won’t have children and had you been of normal height you would only have been 5’9. They gave me a diagnosis of Turners Syndrome and stated they didn’t know much about my diagnosis and while I really didn’t have all the symptoms of Turners, they gave me the diagnosis as they didn’t know what else to call it. I had one symptom of Turners, no ovaries. I had been born without ovaries. I was Catholic; my world felt crushed. My value of a woman was wrapped up in having children.

Can you explain a little about your condition?

My real diagnosis is XX Gonadal Dysgenesis. The best I understand is that a part of the arm of one of the X chromosomes broke off. This was the part that governed height and the development of Ovaries. While I would have been tall due to a father that is 6’4, I am now taller just because. At 17, I was tall as a rail. I was flat chested. I had not developed pubic hair or hair under my arms. It appeared I was stunted. I was growing taller and taller. They put me on Estrogen and Progesterone to induce a period as I do have a uterus. They threatened that I would not stop growing if I didn’t take my estrogen. HRT helped me develop breasts and hair yet I still had no hips, a flat butt and now a loaded chest. I looked in the mirror one day and didn’t recognize myself.

What do you like the most and the least about having a difference of sexual development?

I like the most that I do not have a period as many woman do. I do not have to suffer through these ill effects. The least not going through puberty as other people did. I felt left out and when I heard stories I regretted that I didn’t get to experience things other kids did. I spent time wondering what was wrong with me and in high school I felt so different that I volunteered in the snack stand at school so I didn’t have to sit with others I knew and worried about taking someone else’s chair. I couldn’t relate to any normal teenage angst.

How has it affected your relationships?

I didn’t date in high school, and I married the first man who showed an interest, especially marriage material when he said he didn’t want kids and he said I was all woman. I was with him for 10 years and I found out he was cheating on me the whole time. I wondered what was real and what was wrong with me as a woman that he would want to sleep with others. I felt very less then.

Has it affected your religious views?

I was brought up Catholic. I felt for sure I was being punished for something bad.

What’s the one thing you’d most like people to know about you?

That even though I am 6’1″, I’m harmless, cannot fight and am all mouth. I wish people wouldn’t make assumptions. Get to know me then you can voice an opinion. Stop calling me a boy all the time or saying yes sir. I have breasts that are DD and yet people continually say sir, yes sir, etc. I don’t think I look like a boy.